Lofting an Egg

 The Thrifty Rocketeer blog continues...

It's been a while since I've been involved in a rocket activity...just busy with life and long hours at work.

But this weekend, another club in our state announced they were having a Saturday morning rocket build and launch session.  I didn't recognize the name of the rocket, so I inquired, and was told a great deal about it.

The Green Eggs is a current Estes model that has a green tinted plastic payload, just right for housing an egg, or an electronics bay, or a battery and lights for that night launch you've always dreamed about.

The kit comes singularly or in a bulk pack.  This club had a bulk pack and was holding the build for area kids to get into rocketry.

So, I piled in the car and drove the two hours while the temps were down, to go visit.  Unfortunately, when I got to the library, the room was empty, except for several smaller rockets, one completed Green Eggs, and an unopened bulk kit bag of one rocket.  I looked about and concluded that the group must have either cancelled, moved out to the launch field, or left the bulk kit for me.

So I set to work opening the bag and examining the kit.  I had just started in on it when the club coordinator returned, and was surprised to see me.  He didn't think I was coming, and had just finished with the kids at the launch site.

So I assembled much of the rocket under his watchful eye, and we chatted all things rocketry.

But it also triggered a memory of seven years earlier when I had built a "Scrambler" egg-lofting rocket.  I was under the impression that it was a rite of passage for all rocketeers to build and successfully launch and return a raw egg.  I thought this was to prove your skills and demonstrate the ability to launch softly and safely.

However, I also had read some discussion on line about the mess that a failure could  make to your rocket and the awful clean-up.  Someone had suggested using a small Ziplock baggie, and wrap the egg in plastic to avoid staining the inside of the payload bay.  But someone else had suggested something more simple, and efficient.  And as an adult, I immediately saw the value and logic, even if the solution was a bit, adult.

Put the raw egg inside a tied-off condom.

The simplicity of this, and my familiarity with the product, appealed to me.  So on the appointed day, on the way to the launch site, I stopped by a convenience store for a tank of gas (back when we could afford it) and hunted up a 3 pack of condoms.  They were a bit more pricey than I had recalled, but I got the only brand offered and went to the launch.

I didn't shirk from telling my fellow rocketeers what I was intending to launch, and with some fanfare, I did get the rocket into the air.  (I had also brought a small cooler with 3 eggs on ice, just to assure I had some leeway.)

My first launch went well, and the rocket came down safely under chute.  However, recovery of the egg was a bit more challenging.  You see, not only did I use the condom, but I had ensured my safety with a small snack sized Ziplock baggie.  It was over-kill, but added weight and padding to the foam cushioning that I had added.

The nosecone and rocket floated gently down to a soft landing, and we all cheered.

I happily ran out to collect my rocket, and carried it back to the launch pad, eager to show off the unbroken egg.  Curiously, not a lot of on-lookers were interested to see me recover the egg, but I was still pleased and wanted to show it off.

Among the watchers was our club treasurer, Diane, a middle-aged woman whose husband was flying high power rockets. She casually watched as I opened the payload bay, and removed the baggie.  

But my problem came when I attempted to get hold of the condom with the egg inside.  I had tied off the open end and it did its job very well, keeping the egg inside.  Try as I might, I just couldn't get ahold of the knot to untie the egg. It was just too slippery.

That's when I knew that I had made a mistake.  I had bought the ONLY brand and option of condom available at the store.  And they were lubricated with silicon lube.  Boy, was it slippery.

I was annoyed at my naivety, and commented on how much trouble I was having.  Diane leaned over to observe and asked what I was using, so I explained in detail, what the problem was.  She stammered twice, "Is that... Is that....ONE of them?"

And I realized that I had offended this middle-aged lady with my casual use and reference to a birth control device.  She was catholic, and I have never seen a Hispanic woman blush before that day.  She fell silent and watched me struggle from a distance.

Finally, another rocketeer offered me the use of his jack knife, which I gratefully accepted, and with slippery fingers, cut the end off the condom... releasing the egg.  And with a great flourish, I showed off the egg to him, and then smashed it on the ground to prove that it was still raw.

I had proved my skills but also my naivety.

I never mentioned this again, for fear of offending someone... until today, when the memory came flooding back to me.

I don't think I'll use the same method when I fly this bird.  Perhaps a Ziplock baggie will work just fine.

This has been the Thrifty Rocketeer warning you, "check if it's lubed"!